Synkroniciti is excited to welcome writer Patricia Coffie of Iowa with “Standing Up while Lying Down,” an engaging memoir essay that recalls her experience with exploratory breast surgery. The event itself is a trial—managing the fear of cancer and the vulnerability of having a tender part of the body opened layer by layer while you remain awake under local anesthesia. No one prepares you for the possibility that your surgeon decides this is the perfect moment to bring up a sensitive social issue.
“I asked how the surgery was going. He said he hadn’t reached the lump yet. I said I needed more anesthetic. I asked how deep he had gone. He said he was just continuing layer by layer.
Then he asked what I did for a living. I said I was director of the Waverly Public Library.
‘Do you choose the books?’
‘Yes.’
‘Do you choose the books in the children’s department?'”
What follows is a surreal exchange in which Patricia defends free access to knowledge and literature to a man delving into her exposed breast with a scalpel. He argues that “the majority rules” and that certain books “shouldn’t be in the children’s department.” Patricia holds her ground with grace and humor—an act of quiet courage in a moment when she could not physically stand up for herself.
The surgeon remains courteous, but the imbalance of power is unmistakable. Patricia’s story reminds us how easily personal boundaries can be crossed when someone assumes their authority extends beyond their expertise. Patients are entitled to their own beliefs, and doctors—no matter how skilled—do not get to decide what a community reads. In moments like these, self‑possession becomes an act of resistance, a candle in the dark.
Patricia’s humor carries her through the ordeal, although she has to pull over for a good cry on the drive home. Her humor, humanity and pragmatism leap from the page, transforming an unsettling encounter into a testament to resilience, autonomy, and the unexpected places where we are called to defend our values.
Read “Standing Up while Lying Down” in Synkroniciti’s Audacity issue, Vol. 8, No. 1, available here: https://synkroniciti.com/the-magazine/purchase-individual-issues/.
About Patricia Coffie:
Discovered and loved
the beauty and rhythm of the language
as a child when my father sang songs to me
and my mother read poetry.
Grew up in a large family…
lived and learned family stories.
Taught Language Arts in junior high school…
learned survival stories.
Worked in public and school libraries…
learned people stories.
Explored puppetry…
learned classic stories and creating stories.
Worked on First Walk on Moon…
learned practical stories.
Raised sons…
learned the told and the untold stories.
Became a grandmother…
learned wonder tales all over again.
Listened to the storytellers…learned to tell my own.